Knit your own crown jewels

Happy Jubilee time, Liz!

Apparently the country has gone Jubilee crazeee and, while Union Jacks adorning everybloodything as far as the eye can see is getting a tad tiring on the eyes, at least we, Liz's subjects, get to enjoy a four-day weekend.

Hmm, well you know what they say, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em... so how about getting out the Lurex yarn and knocking up a posh tiara, sash, choker and ring, fit for the Queen? 

This priceless crown jewellery is taken from the 1983 St Michael Fun Knitting book – hideous of cover, wacky of content – which I stumbled upon in a second-hand book tent during the Apple Festival in the village of Appledore in Kent:

A bit on the '80s side for my liking

'Rubies, sapphires, diamonds and emeralds are displayed to outrageous effect in knitted Lurex settings. Imitate full regalia complete with sash and tiara for a truly devastating effect using simple stitches to construct intricate designs...'

Even the most anti-royalists knitters would find that hard to resist. So what are you waiting for? Here are the instructions (parts one, two and three) for your cuddly crown jewels, all jazzed up with eye-wateringly eighties illustrations. You'll be the belle of your street party in this glitzy ensemble (elbow-length white gloves optional).